Le Grand Rant Magnifique

OK…it’s been almost a month.

It’s time.

This is my post-election rant.

People who do not know me well will undoubtedly point out that it has in fact been a month since election night, and suggest that I should…well, let it go.

People who do know me, know that I don’t “let things go” easily. Hell, I’m still pissed off at Jackie Smith for God’s sake.

Pro Football Hall of Fame my ass.

Loser…

A REAL Hall of Fame receiver would have caught that damned pass.

But I digress.

I’ve read nearly every article written (by people worth reading) on the election.

I read the rants and I read the inside stuff, and I read the apocalyptic posts.

I read everything, but I couldn’t write anything. Or rather, every time I began to put my thoughts on the election down, the outcome looked something like this:

“You crazy $*&^%%$#, dumb ##)&^% jackasses! You just #*&^%#$# the whole a#@*^%#@# thing. What the #&^$=(&^ where you $##%** thinking?

Oh…EXCUSE ME!

Did I just #%#* insult you by $#(#%$ suggesting you @#*#&^%^ actually gave this whole #*&^%$# election thing some #*%#$% thought?”

Given the intellectual level that I normally maintain in this blog, those posts where never published.

I am a far bigger person than that.

I like to make sense out of things, to talk things out like civilized people, and look for common ground where none may be readily apparent.

So I decided to talk to some people who do not share my political ideology.

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Holy cow, we are in trouble.

It’s not that the people I spoke to lacked a brain, it’s just that shared among so may, one brain falls way short of being efficient at anything, let alone critical thinking.

Take for example my co-worker. I’ll call him Jerry primarily because that’s his real name. Screw anonymity, and Jerry, if you’re reading this get over it…just like you want me to get over the whole “election thing”.

I asked Jerry why he voted for Obama.

(I know…some people claim that I have a rather strong affinity for masochism.)

Jerry’s response was typical, and he spouted every single talking point promoted by MSNBC, falling short of suggesting that it was his own grandmother on the wheelchair being pushed over the cliff by Satan incarnate himself, Paul Ryan. The only reason he didn’t do that was because I know his grandmother, and she’s not on a wheelchair.

She’s in one or another of the Boca West Country Club’s restaurants three nights a week.

I drilled down on his talking points, and began systematically knocking them down one by one.

Jerry’s eyes were glazing over.

“You know,” he said. “I’m just not into politics like you. I’m a Democrat, so I voted for the Democrat.”

OK…now we were getting somewhere.

“My grandfather was a Democrat, and so was my grandmother, and both my parents, so I’m a Democrat, and I vote Democrat.”

“I get that Jerry, I do.” I replied. “But you didn’t vote for a Democrat, you voted for a Communist. Can’t you see that?”

Jerry was actually offended.

“That’s Republican nonsense,” he was getting upset now. “The man is no Communist, and you have no reason to attack him like that. You Republicans are all the same.”

“Jerry, his grandparents were Communists, his parents were Communists, every person that’s had any measure of influence in his life is or was a Communist, INCLUDING his minister, so just like you naturally became a Democrat, he naturally became a Communist…get it?”

Jerry and I don’t talk much any more. We sort of wave as our cars pass each other in the parking lot on those days when I go to the office, his “Obama 2012” bumper sticker still on display.

That was a worthless encounter if there was ever one such thing.

As an afterthought, and just in case any business owner faced with staff reduction decisions due to the impending cost increases associated with the implementation Obamacare is actually reading this, I suggest that the lay offs should begin in the parking lot.

Obama 2012 on the bumper, pink slip on the windshield.

Sadly, the conversation with Jerry was not atypical.

For some it was a racial identity thing, for others it was because they hated Bush. Some actually tried to engage me in how that whole “evil top 1%” (Jerry’s grandmother came to mind there) should be brought to their knees, and yet every time that I agreed with them, and suggested that they should begin with the guy who owns the company we work for, they all looked at me like I was crazy.

Some people (obviously living in that alternate universe where Bizarro lives) thought things were getting better.

Most of them however, kept coming one to the one unifying theme…everyone wanted something for nothing.

People love Obama because they can get shit for free.

Sigh…

How in the world did we manage to go from “Mr. Gorbachev, tear down this wall!” to Sandra Fluke in just two and a half decades for God’s sake?

What in the HELL is wrong with us?

For the record, purchased in bulk, that $3,000 Ms. Fluke complained about spending in contraceptives during her years at Georgetown Law, translates into 15,000 lubricated condoms.

How do they find time to study?

Do they duct tape the textbooks to the dorms ceilings in Georgetown?

Sad…

What is wrong?

I’ve kept asking myself that question over and over and over again these past few weeks.

How could the people of this country choose Communism freely?

And they did…they don’t know it, but they did.

Check this out:

“Bye, bye Miss American Pie. The Communists have won in America—America continues to repeat the Soviet mistake.

Recently, Obama has been re-elected for a 2nd term by an illiterate society and he is ready to continue his lies of less taxes while he raises them.”

That’s not FOX News, or World Net Daily, or even Lew Rockwell, calling us an “illiterate society” and Obama a liar.

That’s Pravda.

How did we get here for God’s sake?

This country brought the world out of darkness, driving human growth faster and farther than any other civilization before.

We cooked with fire and rode horseback in 1776, and less than 200 years later we walked on the Moon.

Eons of servitude to the elements and fear of common diseases, and four hundred thousand years from that first spark of fire in a cave to “We the People.”

One hundred and ninety-three years from Philadelphia to the Sea of Tranquility.

We built this, and now we are about to systematically destroy it, all in the name of getting shit for free.

The American Dream, once defined as an opportunity, is now an entitlement, and government of the people, by the people, for the people dies a slow death at the hands of the new ruling classes.

Patricians and Princes residing in DC.

Back in 1951, C.M. Kornbluth wrote what in retrospect could be the scariest SciFi story of all time. Included in The Science Fiction Hall of Fame, Volume Two, “The Marching Morons” may hold a clue to both our future, and the path we took to get to where we are today.

In this story, a man wakes up after an unintended long-term period of suspended animation brought about by a freak accident.

The world he wakes up to is quite bizarre.

It it all starts to make sense when he finds out that the average IQ of the general population is about 45, and that one of the side effects of the lower IQ is a propensity for humans to give free rein to physical drives, with procreation being the strongest of all natural urges. As a result of that the human population stands at 5,003,000,000 people, made up of three million “elite” (people with average IQ of 100) and 5,000,000,000 morons. The elite, understanding that the population growth cannot be sustained, breed at a far slower rate than the morons, but because of that they have become veritable slaves, working feverishly trying to keep the morons from destroying the human race.

Asides from everything that they must do to keep things running, they must also spend every spare minute seeking a solution to what they call the Poprob”.

Their problem is simple:

• The morons must be managed or they will literally cause billions of deaths, and the eventual destruction of the human race.
• Sterilizing all the morons is impossible since there aren’t enough “elites” to accomplish that task.
• Propaganda encouraging responsible sexual behavior and small families doesn’t work because the morons can’t fight the higher biological drive that calls for them to procreate.

Sound familiar?

Amazingly enough, the resurrected man quickly finds a simple, yet somewhat harsh solution to the problem.

He offers the morons free trips to Venus, which is described as a tropical paradise with blanket trees, ham bushes, and soap roots. In a world-wide frenzy, every nation rushes to get as many of their people to Venus as soon as possible so that they can stake their claim to the free land.

Being built and piloted by morons, the spaceships all blow up en route.

Now, I’ll leave it to you, kind reader to draw the similarities here. Go ahead and inject any time-worn adage pertaining to the odd similarities between science and fiction that you may wish to inject into this, my post-election rant.

They all work.

Sadly, the way things are going, I see 40 Venusian acres and a M.U.L.E. in humanity’s future.

All because those crazy $*&^%%$# dumb ##)&^% jackasses are #*&^%#$# the whole a#@*^%#@# thing. What the #&^$=(&^ are they $##%** thinking?

Oh…EXCUSE ME JERRY!

Did I just #%#* insult you? Was I #&^#^%# out of line by $#(#%$ suggesting you @#*#&^%^ actually gave this whole #*&^%$# election thing some #*%#$% thought?

Yeah well, eat $&^$ and #^%#$&^% die, you *E%^#$# marching moron!
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I almost made it, didn’t I?

Maybe they are right, maybe I need to figure out a way to start being better at “getting over” things.

I think I’ll work on that now.

P.S. Why the French title?

If we’re gonna BE Europe, we may as well start speaking the lingo.

P.S.S. @*U^%## you Jackie Smith!

Loser…

OK..I’m done.

Back to getting over stuff.